


Five Years

by DreadfulShieldmaiden



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, F/M, Love, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Sex, Spoilers, romanogers - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-05
Updated: 2019-05-05
Packaged: 2020-02-26 00:11:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18712549
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DreadfulShieldmaiden/pseuds/DreadfulShieldmaiden
Summary: Rogers came by to visit Natasha during five years.





	Five Years

**Author's Note:**

> I know we are deep in the fix-it thing, but this gap of five years in which Natasha and Steve were seeing each other really atracts me. This is about it.

Additional note: I discuss why, as a feminist, I disagree with Steve's ending and my everlasting love for Steve and Natasha [here](https://claricestarlinging.tumblr.com/post/184648986537/steve-and-natasha-on-endgame-spoilers). 

 

 

Natasha was doing her laundry. The complex system of cameras and voice communication on the Avengers Tower made her aware that a car was getting near the building. She stopped organizing the dirty clothes and looked at the cameras. It was Rogers.

She smiled, unconsciously.

She was hoping he had bought pizza with him, this time.

 

In the beginning, after Thanos wiped half of all the living creatures, they tried to keep living together, the left, broken and lost Avengers. The ones who survived. Their capacity of surviving was almost a burden. Getting together and occasionally going into missions, it was a way to try to create some kind of normality after the tragedy.

Then, Tony decided to move out with Pepper.  Of course, he justified it; he told them it was due to her pregnancy. They needed more space and a familiar environment.

Rhody went after. He needed to see how the rest of the world. Banner decided to exit to dedicate himself on domesticating the Hulk. Thor had to take care of the remaining Asgardians.

Rogers was the last one to leave. He told her that he felt haunted there, even though he reassured Natasha that he loved her company. He talked to her before his decision and she understood his reasons. She was easy on him. Just like her, he had his more than fair share of ghosts.

 

 

Natasha never left. She felt like she belonged to the Avengers Tower. These ghosts there, they were her friends. Sometimes they were violent, but mostly they slowly became sweet memories.

Stark assured to keep the building there, he said he was not going to shut it down or turn it into something else. He wanted to keep the memories too, she thought.

 Then, Rogers started his visitation. He came by to pick up something he left, in the beginning, but he also spent hours there, mostly talking to Natasha. Trying to convince her to go to the therapeutic sessions of conversation groups he started to participate. She laughed with the idea. Only Rogers and his ever loving and always empathetic heart could believe that an ex-professional killer like Romanov would seat on a group and tell people about her very shattered and sinful life. She never went there. She couldn’t stand the idea of scaring people with her broken mind.

But she accepted talking to him. On the first year after Thanos’ victory, there were occasions in which they spent hours just talking. They talked about the grief, the loss, the pain, the anger. Natasha talked to him, this ageless companion of hers, the one who worked with her, who saw her pain, who knew both Natasha and the Widow, she talked to him like she had nothing to hide from him.

Slowly, Rogers came to know her mind and soul.

 

The visits sometimes changed the pace, the frequency. During the second year, Steve decided to travel the country to see how people were outside New York. He also was looking for the Carter family to see how they were doing. He talked to Natasha about it, told her he would be away for months. Rogers reassured her they could keep contact through social media, but that he would do that only for her, since he tried to avoid it constantly. “Too modern”, he said, laughing, remembering Natasha how old he actually was.

Natasha said it was okay, on her ex-spy Russian silence, though, she feared his absence. Steve never came to know.

He spent more than one year out. She trained on the Avengers Tower’s gym. She went out to patrol the city. She talked to random strangers.

But she missed him every day, even with the social media interaction.

 

He came back on the third winter after Thano’s victory. Rogers returned on a snowy, dark, cold day, when Natasha was watching TV. The system had alerted her on a visitor. It was him.

She watched through the cameras his arrival. Steve was burningly beautiful as ever, holding some food package on his hands.

She opened the door, feeling very ugly in her lazy gym pants and old coat, with her hair half blonde and half red.   Natasha was bothered, why was she feeling the need to be beautiful? It was just Steve, for Heaven’s sake.

She waited on the couch, until he came. He seemed relieved by the warm of the Tower, even with all his super soldier body structure.

 

Steve seated beside her, putting the food package on the small table in front of them, as if he never had left and hugged her. She hugged him back, wishing to never let him go again.

Not understanding what she was doing, Natasha felt his warmth and listened to his heart beat. She started to cry. She cried like a baby.

Then, Steve kissed her. Natasha kissed him back. They kissed deeply, willingly. He was crying too, or so she thought. She shut her thoughts, let her body just follow her desires. Rogers did the same.

They made love on the couch. Several times. Natasha was surprised with his intensity, the kisses they shared seemed to suck all the air out of her lungs. His hands were all over the spy’s body. Steve’s lips followed the same pattern. He seemed to know all the places she could be pleased and also looked like he wanted to create new spot of delight. She just let herself go on the feelings; Natasha wanted to drown. The Widow wanted to forget about Thanos. She wanted to erase all the pain, to silence the whispers on her mind.

Then, she got aware that this was Steve. _Her Steve_. Soon enough, she started to please him back.

Coming with him that night was like an everlasting bliss that her body would keep along with her forever.

 

After that, he kept the visits. They talked about his traveling and his experience. He confessed that he could not find the remaining members Peggy’s family. He hoped they had moved. He feared the real reason of his failure. He also told her that being on his car alone was the moment where he could finally grieve her loss, after all this time.

“One loss at time, and I think one day I might deal with them all”, Steve said, while they were eating pizza after sex.

Natasha smiled.

“I hope we all can. One day.”

 

He was always there. Altogether with the food – he never cooked to her, he told her he was terrible at it –, massage, sex and caring. He cared about her. He could tell if she was or not eating healthy. He knew when Natasha was exaggerating on her training on the gym to self punish her body. He helped her with the Tower’s shore. He was there.

Natasha had not developed many thoughts about love. As a spy, it had been weakness.

Now, becoming the Natasha-after-Thanos, love had become Steve.

 

If she knew it would be their last day together, alone on the tower, she would never let him go. She would have told him, she loved him.

The day followed the routine of his visits. They ate, they talked (a lot, hours), they made love, they watched movies. They made love, again. They slept. It was the blissful routine of his company.

Then, he had to go back to his home, he hugged her before leaving the Tower.

“Thank you, Nat.” he told her, with a smile.

She kissed him, watched him getting into his car through the cameras and went back to her chores and daily routine without him.

 

The next thing was Lang, time travelling, another chance to defeat Thanos.

She would see him again in a minute.

She never did.


End file.
